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The in flowed into him. Do only what you enter to. A eight until nine think about Helen King. He settled his officially body. Ten one men floated on the striped inner chance of his eye.

Leonard Sale stirred in agony. Mine, mine, cried a loud voice. Ours, ours, shrieked the chorus. The din of metal, the crash of sword, the conflict, the battle, the fight, the war. All of it exploding, his mind fiercely torn apart.

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He leaped up, screaming. The landscape melted and flowed. A voice said, "I am Tylle of Rathalar. Tylle of Rathalar, Killer of Men! He stood with the sweat boiling out of him. He was trembling so violently he could not stand. He jerked the food kit open, did something to a chemical packet. Hot coffee was ready in an instant. He mouthed it through the helmet tube greedily. He sucked in raw gulps of breath. The coffee seared his tongue. No record of insanity in the family for two hundred years. No reason for insanity now. No shock to that. Just an ordinary planetoid.

Ordinary, ordinary; ordinary place. No reason for insanity. Somewhere a vanishing laughter. The pebbles were getting hot. The How to keep him wanting more in bed was big and dark. He looked at his fingers and saw the way the sun burned on every black hair. He looked at his boots and the dust on them. Suddenly he felt very happy because he made a decision. He made a routine. He would write on a pad with a yellow pencil everything he saw. Then he would sit down and open a can of oily sardines, and some canned fresh bread with good butter on it, and pass it in through the helmet airlocks. From twelve-thirty until four he would read nine chapters of War and Peace.

He took the book from the wreckage, and laid it where he might find it later. There was a book of T. That might be nice. Supper would come at five-thirty and then from six until ten he would listen to the radio from Earth. There would be a couple of bad comedians telling jokes and a bad singer singing some songs, and the latest news flashes, signing off at midnight with the U. Ho, ho, he thought. He wanted to sleep. And the fact that he was afraid of sleep made him want to lie down all the more and shut his eyes and curl up. Can you stay awake all that time, for six nights?

Until the rescue ship comes? Are you that good, that strong? The answer was no. What are you afraid of? Brace up to it, old man. Chin up, and all that rot. He sat down on the hard ground. He felt very much like crying. He felt as if life was over and he was entering new and unknown territory. It was such a deceiving day, with the sun warm; physically, he felt able and well, one might fish on such a day as this, or pick flowers or kiss a woman or anything. But in the midst of a lovely day, what did one get? He lay down and closed his eyes. He was tired of messing around. All right, he thought, if you are death, come get me. I want to know what all this nonsense is about.

Yes, I know, said Leonard Sale, lying there. Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh, said a voice. I know that, also, said Leonard Sale, irritably. His mouth hung open wildly. Leonard smiled a rictal smile. How long have you waited? Eeeeeeeeeeeeeee, sang the chorus, far away. Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh, sang another army, waiting to fight. And there were two nations, strong nations, led by two strong men. And he, that one who calls himself Tylle. And the planet declined and gave way to nothingness.

wantting The peoples and the armies languished in the midst wantjng a great war which had lasted five thousand years. Novena prayer for finding true love lived kdep lives and loved long loves, drank much, slept jn, fought much. And when the planet died, our bodies withered, and, only in time, and with much science, did we survive. But there is nothing of you! What is a body without a mind? But survival is survival even ebd unconscious.

The minds of nim nations, through science, through wonder, survived. We were vapours, merely. For a long time. To give us our needed body. I resent your intrusion. Did you heard him, Iorr? Hum was as if a spike had been thrust and beaten down wantig the bivalvular halves of his brain. Now he was terribly clear. He was their universe. The world of his thoughts, his brain, his skull, divided into two camps, that of Iorr, that of Tylle. They were using him! Pennants flung up on a pink kkeep sky! Brass shields caught the sun. Grey animals shifted and came rushing in bristling tides of sword and plume and trumpet.

On Ten mmore men hurled across hum small hidden stage. Ten thousand men floated on the shellacked inner ball of his eye. Ten thousand javelins hissed between wantibg small bone hulls of bim head. Ten thousand jewelled guns exploded. Moore thousand voices chanted in his ears. Now bef body was riven and i, shaken and rolled, he was screaming, writhing, the plates of his skull threatened to burst asunder. The gabbling, the shrilling, as across bone plains of mind and continent of inner marrow, through gullies of vein, down hills of artery, over rivers of melancholy, came armies wamting armies, un army, two armies, swords flashed in the sun, wantihg down upon each other, on thousand wanitng snatching, scrabbling, cutting at him, demanding, using.

In a moment, the hard collision, one army on another, the rush, tk blood, the hlm, the fury, the death, the insanity! Like cymbals, Hkw armies struck! He leaped up, raving. He ran across the desert. He ran and ran and did not stop running. He sat down and cried. He sobbed until his lungs ached. He cried very hard and long. Tears ran down How to keep him wanting more in bed cheeks. All was normal again. The rocks were baked by the sun. He managed, after a time, to cook himself a few hot biscuits, which How to keep him wanting more in bed ate with strawberry jam. What jore innocent-looking world, and what a monster it really is. Pity them, whoever crashed here before, if any ever did.

Warm sun, hard rocks, not a sign of wahting. Until you shut your eyes and relaxed your mind. And the night and the voices and the insanity and the death padded in on soft feet. By a supreme effort of will, it was no longer shaking. To think that thought could live that long! A million years, perhaps, all these thoughts of death and disorder and conquest, lingering in the innocent but poisonous air of the planet, waiting for a real man to give them a channel through which they might issue again in all their senseless virulence. Now that he was feeling better, it was all silly.

All I have to do, he thought, is stay awake six nights. Can I hold out? Where will these silly monarchs be if you put a bullet through their stage? You, Leonard Sale, are the small stage. And they the players. And what if you put a bullet through the wings, tearing down scenes, destroying curtains, ruining lines! First of all, he must radio through to Marsport, again. If there was any way they could rush the rescue ship sooner, then maybe he could hang on. Anyway, he must warn them what sort of planet this was, this so innocent-seeming spot of nightmare and fever vision - He tapped on the radio key for a minute. The radio was dead. It had sent through the proper rescue message, received a reply, and then extinguished itself.

The proper touch of irony, he thought. There was only one thing to do. He got a yellow pencil and delineated his six-day plan of escape. Tonight, he wrote, read six more chapters of War and Peace. At four in the morning have hot black coffee. At four-fifteen take cards from pack and play ten games of solitaire. This should take until six-thirty when - more coffee. He tried the radio receiver. From eight until nine think about Helen King. On second thought, think about Helen right now. He marked that out with his pencil. The rest of the days were set down in minute detail. He checked the medical kit.

There were several packets of tablets that would keep you awake. One tablet an hour every hour for six days. He felt quite confident. Well, with one thing and another it was Tolstoy or Balzac, gin-rummy, coffee, tablets, walking, more Tolstoy, more Balzac, more gin-rummy, more solitaire. The first day passed, as did the second and the third. On the fourth day he lay quietly in the shade of a rock, counting to a thousand by fives, then by tens, to keep his mind occupied and awake. His eyes were so tired he had to bathe them frequently in cool water. He was numb with medicine.

He resembled a waxen dummy stuffed with things to preserve him in a state of horrified wakefulness. His eyes were glass, his tongue a rusted pike, his fingers felt as if they were gloved in needles and fur. He followed the hand of his watch. One second less to wait, he thought. Two seconds, three seconds, four, five, ten, thirty seconds. Now an hour less time to wait. Oh, ship, hurry on thy appointed round! He began to laugh softly. My rules offer a way of behaviour totally alien to neurotics, but typical of emotionally and psychologically healthy people: The first rule is the one that provokes the most resistance, questions, doubts and accusations.

Love yourself, ignore everyone else, and you will live happily ever after? For some reason, everyone implies that if you live the way you want you will disadvantage the people around you. Even worse, in our society we despise our own wishes as if they are always low and perverse. I would even say that Russian people look at their desires with caution and fear. The concept is as follows: This is usually followed by a confession that he needs someone with a firm hand to keep him in line, strong reins and so on. I would call this psychology the mind-set of a slave. There is another concept. The grandmother had a saying: There is a huge difference. He is fixated on himself, his problems, and his inner emotions — the most common of them is feeling hurt.

And he continues stacking and storing the offences against him. So what is a person who loves himself like? He always chooses to do what is close to his heart. Even if it leads to losing money. He might even lose much more. But whom would he blame? There is nothing wrong with him. He lives amongst the people he loves and he loves his work. He is in harmony with himself, and so he is kind to others and open to the rest of the world. For example, he feels a duty for his wife, but he feels for his lover. So he gets a present for his wife because it has to be done, not because he wants to make her happy. Or he goes to work not because he loves his job, but because he has a mortgage and hopes he can endure another five years of the office from hell to pay it off.

Here is a great example of such a battle: Even if she loses weight, she loses the battle, because she still longs for that cream cake, usually sometime around one a. We will talk later about the connection between extra weight, overeating and neuroses of all types.

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